When You Know What I Know

When you know what I know, you'll wish you didn't.

It's not the kind of thing you can talk about at school, or at the park, or anywhere, with a new friend or an old one, or even with your sister. (She's too little.)

But it's everywhere once you know, once you can't not know. In your face, under your eyelids. If you turn your back on it, there it is anyway.

One day after school, in the basement on the couch, Tori's uncle did something bad. Afterwards, Tori did the right thing, and told her mom. But even if it was the brave thing to do, her mom still didn't believe her at first. Her grandma still takes his side. And Tori doesn't want anyone else--even her best friend--to know what happened.

Over the course of the following year, Tori finds herself battling mixed emotions--anger, shame, and sadness--as she deals with the trauma. But with the help of her mom, little sister Taylor, her best friend and others, Tori will find a way to have the last word.

“"Written with leap-off-the page boldness and sensitivity, Sonja K. Solter's When You Know What I Know is as fresh and profound a story of hope in the aftermath of tragedy as I have ever read. Young readers will hang on every word of Tori's confusion, pain, and hard-won renewal. A triumph!"-- Tony Abbott, author of The Summer of Owen Todd and The Great Jeff”

"A difficult but important read, giving a voice to sexual abuse survivors and helping others see the complexity of emotions and the hard work that goes into the healing process."--School Library Journal
"Solter emphasizes the emotional effects both of the molestation and of the disparate reactions she encounters when others hear about it. This offering of hope after trauma is, importantly, unromanticized."--Kirkus Reviews
"The book is smart."--The Bulletin
"Written with leap-off-the page boldness and sensitivity, Sonja K. Solter's When You Know What I Know is as fresh and profound a story of hope in the aftermath of tragedy as I have ever read. Young readers will hang on every word of Tori's confusion, pain, and hard-won renewal. A triumph!"--Tony Abbott, author of The Summer of Owen Todd and The Great Jeff
"This gentle take on a sensitive subject could be comforting for a child coping with sexual abuse. Debut author Sonja K. Solter made a wise decision in choosing to write When You Know What I Know in verse. The poetry conveys the sense of participating intimately in Tori's inner journey through a difficult experience in her life. The tale is emotionally raw without having to be graphic about the abuse."--Barbara Suanders, Common Sense Media, A+ review

Sonja K. Solter graduated from Stanford University and earned an MFA in Writing for Children and Young Adults from Hamline University, with a critical thesis on writing trauma in middle grade and young adult realistic fiction. She is currently a creative writing mentor to youth with the Society of Young Inklings and enjoys writing poetry and prose for children of all ages. Sonja lives with her husband and two children in Louisville, CO. When You Know What I Know is her debut novel.

When you know what I know, you'll wish you didn't. It's not the kind of thing you can talk about at school, or at the park, or anywhere, with a new friend or an old one, or even with your sister. (She's too little.) But it's everywhere once you know, once you can't not know. In your face, under your eyelids. If you turn your back on it, there it is anyway. One day after school, in the basement on the couch, Tori's uncle did something bad . Afterwards, Tori did the right thing, and told her mom. But even if it was the brave thing to do, her mom still didn't believe her at first. Her grandma still takes his side. And Tori doesn't want anyone else--even her best friend--to know what happened.Over the course of the following year, Tori finds herself battling mixed emotions--anger, shame, and sadness--as she deals with the trauma. But with the help of her mom, little sister Taylor, her best friend and others, Tori will find a way to have the last word.

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