Nobody Panic

'Absolutely delightful, surprisingly useful and pleasingly absurd' - Rachel Parris

'Tessa and Stevie are two of the funniest people I know' - Nish Kumar

'A must-read for anyone struggling to be a convincing grown up' - Richard Herring

'Bloody funny and genuinely informative' - Ellie Taylor

Trying to get your life together? Got three dead houseplants, no debit card, and an exploded yoghurt in your bag? Useful, funny and life-affirming, Nobody Panic is an instruction manual for anyone with absolutely no idea what they're doing.

From the creators of the critically acclaimed podcast comes a series of How To guides for everything from job interviews to leaving a WhatsApp group, from understanding the oven to dealing with your best friend's new (astoundingly dull) partner. There's also a poem about taxes.

Comedians and professional panickers Tessa Coates and Stevie Martin are here to help you learn from their many, many mistakes, and remind you that when it comes to life, we're all in this together - so nobody panic.

Praise for the podcast:

'Hilarious and brilliant' - Grazia

'Witty, smart and oh-so-relatable' - Evening Standard

'Jaunty' - The Times

“Stevie and Tessa deliver solid, empathetic and hilarious life advice: a must-read for anyone struggling to be a convincing grown up. Which, let's face it, is all of us.”

Stevie and Tessa are two of the least qualified people to advise anyone. Thankfully they are two of the funniest people I know. -- Nish Kumar
I'd expected this book to be bloody funny (which it is) but what I hadn't accounted for was it being genuinely informative. Thanks to Stevie and Tessa I now know everything from how to be productive, how to keep a plant alive, how Stevie's dad packs a suitcase and most importantly, why you should always eat the dead frog first. -- Ellie Taylor
Absolutely delightful, surprisingly useful and pleasingly absurd -- Rachel Parris
-- Richard Herring
Funny funny women, I love them -- Suzi Ruffell
Hilarious and brilliant writing. I wish Stevie and Tessa were available to hire to sort all my life problems, but instead you can just read this tremendously funny book. -- Cariad Lloyd
This book is VERY funny and charming in addition to being extremely informative. Nobody Panic is funny and wise and warm. Thanks to this book, my plants are thriving, my groupchats are manageable, and I finally know how to use my oven. If you are a human being who worries about anything, or if you want to read an absolutely first rate poem about the UK's tax system, this is the book for you. -- Monica Heisey
Nobody Panic [the podcast] has comforted me and made me cackle, and this brilliant book does exactly the same -- Emma Gannon

This book is a rarity: absolutely hilarious and yet, incredibly helpful. I always wanted a Stevie and a Tessa in my handbag to consult when things get tough, and now I have

-- Pippa Evans

I LOVE THIS BOOK. It's a triumph, I laughed so hard - and I learned, guys, I learned!
I'm sorry, a book this hilarious has no right also being this useful. Nobody Panic is the book I needed in my twenties, the book I need now and the book I suspect I'll still need in a decade's time. Like the literary equivalent of the friend who takes you firmly by the shoulders in the toilets and tells you to stop being ridiculous, it's equal parts practical, reassuring and gleefully funny. They should be handing it out for free on the NHS, but until then I suggest buying a copy for every tote bag you own just to be on the safe side.

-- Lauren Bravo
Normally, ACTUALLY USEFUL & FUNNY do not go together, but this book is the Holy Grail! You will laugh and learn how to put up a shelf - my dream -- Aisling Bea

Tessa Coates (Author)

Tessa Coates is a writer, performer, journalist, comedian and one third of critically acclaimed sketch group Massive Dad. Her debut solo show Primates sold out the entire run at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival and ran at the Soho Theatre to more sell out audiences. After performing her show in LA there was a competitive situation to produce her first TV comedy series in the US which is now at ABC studios with Greg Daniels (The Office) and Howard Klein (3 Arts).

Stevie Martin (Author)

Stevie Martin is an actor, writer comedian and also part of Massive Dad. Stevie had performed to solo Edinburgh Shows, Hot Content ('Top Comedy Shows to See at the Fringe', Time Out) and Vol. 1. She has co-written, co-starred in and co-produced several BBC3 Quickies, and written and starred in numerous branded sketches for several brands from Ocado to Acuvue. A writer published everywhere from Vice to the Guardian, Stevie is working on her first book.

' Absolutely delightful, surprisingly useful and pleasingly absurd' - Rachel Parris ' Tessa and Stevie are two of the funniest people I know' - Nish Kumar ' A must-read for anyone struggling to be a convincing grown up ' - Richard Herring ' Bloody funny and genuinely informative ' - Ellie Taylor Trying to get your life together? Got three dead houseplants, no debit card, and an exploded yoghurt in your bag? Useful, funny and life-affirming, Nobody Panic is an instruction manual for anyone with absolutely no idea what they're doing.From the creators of the critically acclaimed podcast comes a series of How To guides for everything from job interviews to leaving a WhatsApp group, from understanding the oven to dealing with your best friend's new (astoundingly dull) partner. There's also a poem about taxes.Comedians and professional panickers Tessa Coates and Stevie Martin are here to help you learn from their many, many mistakes, and remind you that when it comes to life, we're all in this together - so nobody panic. Praise for the podcast: ' Hilarious and brilliant' - Grazia ' Witty, smart and oh-so-relatable' - Evening Standard ' Jaunty' - The Times

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