I'd Like to Play Alone, Please

Combining his signature curmudgeonly humor with, as Newsweek put it, a "silly approach to upsetting topics," Tom Segura presents a series of personal stories packed with the crazy characters and strong opinions fans have come to know and love from his podcasts and standup.

The essays in I'd Like to Play Alone, Please feature comedic tales from Tom's time on the road, his marriage, the trials and tribulations of parenting young children and, perhaps most memorably, his dad who, like any good Baby Boomer father, likes to talk about his bowel movements and share graphic Vietnam stories at inappropriate moments. It's enough to make anyone want some peace and quiet. This book will have readers laughing out loud and nodding in agreement with Segura's central message: in a world where everyone is increasingly insane, sometimes you just need to be alone.

“"Tom Segura delivers a treatise that is as timely as it is thought provoking and...actually, he did something better...a book that's ridiculously funny!!!! If you want to live inside the mind of one of the best comics out there, here's your chance. I hear the audio version is for shit, though..."-- Jon Stewart”

"[An] rrreverent collection of personal stories. . .Segura's candor is undeniably entertaining. Fans will find this a riot."--Publishers Weekly
"[L]augh out loud funny. . .Segura is impish and charming and clever and self-deprecating."--Forbes
"Segura's quick wit and irreverent charm come across loud and clear in "I'd Like to Play Alone, Please," a collection of essays that reads like a stand-up set deserving of a standing ovation."--The Los Angeles Times
"While Segura's off-color humor is not for everyone, his fans will doubtlessly enjoy both his essays and the included black-and-white photos. Often crude but undeniably funny."--Kirkus Reviews
"I'd Like to Play Alone, Please is a stereotypically masculine tour de force with farts, football and a third thing starting with "f" that's not fit to print, occasionally interrupted by completely disarming, heartfelt sentiments. Then followed by more poop jokes...The book is funny, surprising and even sweet at times."--Associated Press
"Stand-up comedian Tom Segura built his career making laugh-out-loud funny observations live, onstage and for his multiple podcasts. With the fittingly titled I'd Like To Play Alone, Please--so named for Segura's son's brutally pointed first sentence--the witty, relatable, exhausted curmudgeon welcomes audiences into an equally entertaining but more intimate romp."--AV Club
"One of the funniest men I know has written an extremely funny book of stories that he's never told on stage. There's lots to learn too, like how close Tom came to playing in the NFL (not very); or why sitting next to Mike Tyson on a plane is the most dangerous and exciting thing in world; or how Tom continues to be one of the greatest storytellers on the planet."--Ali Wong
"Tom Segura is a great guy, an amazing friend, and a limitless well of hilarious stories. He also has an appreciation for the absurdity of life that borders on mental illness. This book is a window into his beautifully fcked-up mind, where some of the dumbest people and the ridiculous things they do take center stage, all masterfully animated by one of the best stand-up comics on earth. He's my favorite kind of comic because his take on life is legitimately therapeutic. His enthusiasm for stupid sht is so contagious that it actually changes your mood and convinces you to join in on his way of seeing it. I love him to death, and his book is f*cking awesome."--Joe Rogan
"Tom Segura delivers a treatise that is as timely as it is thought provoking and...actually, he did something better...a book that's ridiculously funny!!!! If you want to live inside the mind of one of the best comics out there, here's your chance. I hear the audio version is for shit, though..."--Jon Stewart

Tom Segura is a comedian originally from Cincinnati, Ohio. Well known for his Netflix specials Completely Normal and Mostly Stories, Segura has also made televisions appearances that include Conan, Happy Endings, The Late Late Show, among others, and multiple stand up appearances on Comedy Central. Tom performs at the top comedy festivals in the world and also regularly appears on XM radio comedy channels and fan favorites such as Bennington Show. Segura has been a regular guest on some of the most downloaded podcasts in the world of comedy such as The Joe Rogan Experience and WTF with Marc Maron.

Additionally, his noted podcast, "Your Mom's House," which he co-hosts with his wife, comedian Christina Pazsitzky, was a finalist for Best Comedy Podcast at the Stitcher Awards.

Combining his signature curmudgeonly humor with, as Newsweek put it, a "silly approach to upsetting topics," Tom Segura presents a series of personal stories packed with the crazy characters and strong opinions fans have come to know and love from his podcasts and standup.The essays in I'd Like to Play Alone, Please feature comedic tales from Tom's time on the road, his marriage, the trials and tribulations of parenting young children and, perhaps most memorably, his dad who, like any good Baby Boomer father, likes to talk about his bowel movements and share graphic Vietnam stories at inappropriate moments. It's enough to make anyone want some peace and quiet. This book will have readers laughing out loud and nodding in agreement with Segura's central message: in a world where everyone is increasingly insane, sometimes you just need to be alone.

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