The Connected Parent

Today's teenagers spend an average of nine hours per day with their noses immersed in the glow of their screens. Tweens are not far behind, at six hours a day. Parents of this new, ultra-connected generation struggle with decisions completely new to parenting: Should they limit a child's screen time? Should an eight-year old be allowed to go on social media? What about playing video games with strangers? How can we keep them safe from harm when they go online? Are they going to grow up less socially able if their friendships are mostly conducted via text and emojis?

In The Connected Parent, acclaimed childhood development and technology experts John Palfrey and Urs Gasser tackle these and other concerns of parents in the digital age. The book is organized by the topics parents have asked about most often, from screen time and safety to addiction and aggressive behaviour. But rather than pretending to have the only-or even the best-advice for every child and every family, the authors share the evidence as well as their own (sometimes strong) point of view, all in order to empower parents with ground-breaking insights that they can use to inform their approach for their own unique situations.

The outcome of over a decade of research on children and technology conducted at the Berkman Klein Center for Internet & Society at Harvard Law School, The Connected Parent is required reading for any parent trying to help their kids safely navigate the fast-changing, uncharted territory our hyper-connected world.

“"Palfrey and Gasser offer a thoughtful and necessary consideration of the difficulties of parenting digital natives, and how to contend with them. They show us how to remain connected to our kids, and to our humanity, in an age in which our kids live, learn, and struggle as much online as they do in the physical world."-- Jonathan Zittrain, Harvard University”

"The Connected Parent comes at a time when the practice of parenting has been made much more challenging as children spend increasing amounts of time with screens, technology, and the world around them. Parents have been overwhelmed by fear-mongering, misinformation, and confusion when it comes to their children's engagement with the digital world. The Connected Parent is a book that many parents will find refreshing, informative, and grounded in the familiar realities of daily life. Drawing from some of the best research in the world and their deep subject matter expertise John Palfrey and Urs Gasser make a significant contribution to the ongoing conversation about how to help our children use technology more effectively while also supporting their health, happiness, and readiness for the future."--S. Craig Watkins, author of The Digital Edge: How Black and Latino Youth Navigate Digital Inequality
"The Connected Parent is a lucid guide for parents everywhere who aren't sure what to make of our hyperconnected world and its effects on their children. Palfrey and Gasser offer balanced answers to some of the issue's trickiest puzzles: How much screen time is too much? Can my kids become addicted to video games and social media? Can an online social life be nourishing in the same way as offline social lives have been for millennia? My favorite part of the book, though, was its focus on remedies -- on the importance of exposing kids to the kinds of diversity, opportunities to learn, and civic life that are often hard to find online, but represent the best experiences in our real, offline world. Highly recommended."--Adam Alter, marketing and psychology professor, New York University Stern School of Business, New York Times-bestselling author of Irresistible and Drunk Tank Pink
"I can't imagine a more important book for a caretaker or parent of a child or young adult. Many parents think they understand the online world their children navigate for hours every day, but this moment is more complex than any other in the digital age. Children and young adults experience ideas, emotions, and feelings of belonging based on how they experience their online world. Palfrey and Gasser offer clear direction and vital insight on understanding their digital space and making it safe, fun, and productive. The Connected Parent is a must read for anyone with a child (and those preparing to have one)."--Farah Pandith, author and former U.S. diplomat
"If you are a parent, educator, or clinician, or in fact anyone interested in healthy development in our modern digital age, The Connected Parent is a compelling, comprehensive, and clear presentation of the latest science illuminating how life on the small screen influences our children and adolescents' lives. Building a solid foundation of research and practical advice, John Palfrey and Urs Gasser offer an insightful and effective approach to helping our youth grow with resilience, relational connection, and a wise approach to being engaged citizens in an uncertain and ever-changing world."--Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., New York Times-bestselling author of The Developing Mind
"Palfrey and Gasser offer a thoughtful and necessary consideration of the difficulties of parenting digital natives, and how to contend with them. They show us how to remain connected to our kids, and to our humanity, in an age in which our kids live, learn, and struggle as much online as they do in the physical world."--Jonathan Zittrain, Harvard University
"Parents and any other adults involved in the lives of young people today need advice and wisdom about how to protect and how to assist 'digital natives' who often live as much online as in person. Internationally recognized experts John Palfrey and Urs Gasser provide a rare combination of practical, concrete wisdom and deeply-researched knowledge addressing fears and benefits from social media and other digital worlds of children and teens. Their accessible insights will help today's adults ensure safety, address anxieties and harassment, and enhance learning and civic engagement while also deepening meaningful connections with the young people in their lives."--Martha Minow, Harvard University
"The authors effectively combine research and anecdote, and they carefully sum up their recommendations at the end of each chapter along with a list of common questions. Because the influence of technology will only grow in coming years, this thorough investigation is a welcome addition to the parenting shelves."--Kirkus
"This book is the must-read guide for parents as they navigate their children's journey in all things digital. No duo is more suited for the task -- as esteemed educators, prominent researchers, and as parents of teens themselves, Palfrey and Gasser help guide parents on their shepherding of their kids through responsible, thoughtful, and rewarding uses of digital tools. The book is filled with tips on how to be effective partners and interlocutors in the process of working with teenagers as they game, learn, befriend, and experiment online. The book illuminates on questions about privacy, safety, and overuse of digital tools. This is the guide that I wish I had when I was parenting teens."--Danielle Keats Citron, author of Hate Crimes in Cyberspace

John Palfrey is president of the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation and a former faculty director of the Berkman Klein Center for Internet and Society at Harvard University. He previously served as head of school at Phillips Academy in Andover, Massachusetts. He lives in Chicago, Illinois.

Urs Gasser is executive director of the Berkman Klein Center for Internet and Society and a professor of practice at Harvard University. He lives in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Today's teenagers spend an average of nine hours per day with their noses immersed in the glow of their screens. Tweens are not far behind, at six hours a day. Parents of this new, ultra-connected generation struggle with decisions completely new to parenting: Should they limit a child's screen time? Should an eight-year old be allowed to go on social media? What about playing video games with strangers? How can we keep them safe from harm when they go online? Are they going to grow up less socially able if their friendships are mostly conducted via text and emojis? In The Connected Parent , acclaimed childhood development and technology experts John Palfrey and Urs Gasser tackle these and other concerns of parents in the digital age. The book is organized by the topics parents have asked about most often, from screen time and safety to addiction and aggressive behaviour. But rather than pretending to have the only-or even the best-advice for every child and every family, the authors share the evidence as well as their own (sometimes strong) point of view, all in order to empower parents with ground-breaking insights that they can use to inform their approach for their own unique situations.The outcome of over a decade of research on children and technology conducted at the Berkman Klein Center for Internet & Society at Harvard Law School, The Connected Parent is required reading for any parent trying to help their kids safely navigate the fast-changing, uncharted territory our hyper-connected world.

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