I Swear I'll Make It Up to You

An odyssey of family, heartbreak, violence, punk rock, brokenness, broke-ness, sex, love, loss, drinking, drinking, drinking, and an unlikely savior: distance running.A misfit kid at the best of times, Mishka Shubaly had his world shattered when, in a twenty-four-hour span in 1992, he survived a mass shooting on his school's campus, then learned that his parents were getting divorced. His father, a prominent rocket scientist, abandoned the family and their home was lost to foreclosure. Shubaly swore to avenge the wrongs against his mother, but instead plunged into a magnificently toxic love affair with alcohol.Almost two decades later, Shubaly's life changed again when a fateful five-mile run after a bar fight inspired him to clean up his life. And when he finally reconnected with his estranged father, he discovered the story of his childhood was radically different from what he thought he knew. In this fiercely honest, emotional, and self-laceratingly witty book, Shubaly relives his mistakes, misfortunes, and infrequent good decisions: the disastrous events that fractured his life his incendiary romances his hot-and-cold career as a rock musician meeting his newborn nephew while out of his gourd on cough syrup. I Swear I'll Make It Up to You is an apology for choices Shubaly never thought he'd live long enough to regret, a journey so far down the low road that it took him years of running to claw his way back.

“"We all have heroes. I would never want to imagine Tom Waits going to therapy or Bukowski running a 10k. In my heart, Mishka Shubaly will always be spilled over the bar next to me and playing on the jukebox of my soul." --Doug Stanhope "Here is a young writer fully in possession of an immense talent. His story is about what happens when the dream runs out, when the bank forecloses and the father lights out for the territory. It is a memoir with a mythic dimension--the angry son's vow to avenge his deserted mother--and a contemporary vocabulary of bad drugs and hard times. I Swear I'll Make It Up to You explores one of the great unanswered questions of our time: what does it really mean to be a man?" --Caitlin Flanagan, contributing editor to the Atlantic "There's no storyteller like Mishka Shubaly--hardcore on every emotional level, he scares the bejeezus out of me, especially when he's cracking me up. I Swear I'll Make It Up To You is a brilliantly toxic confession awash in booze, bodily fluids, and the shock of accidentally turning into a human being, against your will." --Rob Sheffield, author of Love Is a Mix Tape”

"In this memoir of darkness and redemption, singer/songwriter [Mishka] Shubaly describes his virulent romance with alcohol and his struggle to escape the toxic embrace by way of long-distance running." --Publishers Weekly "I Swear I'll Make It Up To You is a mercilessly honest trip to the very center of alcoholic despondency, followed by a perfectly messy, self-deprecating squirm toward the light. An elegant and eminently human account of what it means to struggle, despair, dream and ultimately find meaning in an uncomfortable world. This is the memoir I wish I could write. Wish I had written. And for that I will always resent this author I call a friend." --Rich Roll, bestselling author of Finding Ultra "If Mishka Shubaly can trade in his pills and booze for a pair of Nikes, there's hope for every addict and drunk out there. This book is rehab for the soul." --Cat Marnell "We all have heroes. I would never want to imagine Tom Waits going to therapy or Bukowski running a 10k. In my heart, Mishka Shubaly will always be spilled over the bar next to me and playing on the jukebox of my soul." --Doug Stanhope

Mishka Shubaly writes true stories about drink, drugs, disasters, desire, deception, and their aftermath. He began drinking at 13 and college at 15. At 22, he received the Dean's Fellowship from the Master's Writing Program at Columbia University. Upon receiving his expensive MFA, he promptly moved into a Toyota minivan to tour the country nonstop as a singer-songwriter. At 32, he got sober and shortly thereafter began publishing a string of bestselling Kindle Singles through Amazon. His writing has been praised for its grit, humour, fearlessness, and heart. He lives in Brooklyn, where he is at work on his third solo album.

An odyssey of family, heartbreak, violence, punk rock, brokenness, broke-ness, sex, love, loss, drinking, drinking, drinking, and an unlikely savior: distance running.A misfit kid at the best of times, Mishka Shubaly had his world shattered when, in a twenty-four-hour span in 1992, he survived a mass shooting on his school's campus, then learned that his parents were getting divorced. His father, a prominent rocket scientist, abandoned the family and their home was lost to foreclosure. Shubaly swore to avenge the wrongs against his mother, but instead plunged into a magnificently toxic love affair with alcohol.Almost two decades later, Shubaly's life changed again when a fateful five-mile run after a bar fight inspired him to clean up his life. And when he finally reconnected with his estranged father, he discovered the story of his childhood was radically different from what he thought he knew. In this fiercely honest, emotional, and self-laceratingly witty book, Shubaly relives his mistakes, misfortunes, and infrequent good decisions: the disastrous events that fractured his life his incendiary romances his hot-and-cold career as a rock musician meeting his newborn nephew while out of his gourd on cough syrup. I Swear I'll Make It Up to You is an apology for choices Shubaly never thought he'd live long enough to regret, a journey so far down the low road that it took him years of running to claw his way back.

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