Her international bestseller, the book that shows us at last, why we find it so difficult to talk to the opposite sex. Reissued to coincide with her new book The Argument Culture.
Why do women feel that men don't tell them anything, but just lecture and criticise? Why do men feel that women nag them and never get to the point? Deborah Tannen shows us how women and men talk in different ways. While women use language to make connections and reinforce intimacy, men use it to preserve their status and independence.
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Summary
Her international bestseller, the book that shows us at last, why we find it so difficult to talk to the opposite sex. Reissued to coincide with her new book The Argument Culture.
Why do women feel that men don't tell them anything, but just lecture and criticise? Why do men feel that women nag them and never get to the point? Deborah Tannen shows us how women and men talk in different ways. While women use language to make connections and reinforce intimacy, men use it to preserve their status and independence.
Description
Why is it that some women and men seem to talk at cross purposes? Some have claimed that conversations are the forum of male power games, but the author suggests that jockeying for attention is not the whole story and that even when domination is the result, it is not always the intention. She shows how many frictions may arise because girls and boys grow up in essentially different cultures. Where women use language to seek confirmation, make connections and reinforce intimacies, men use it to protect their independence and negotiate status. The result is that conversation becomes a cross-cultural communication, fraught with genuine confusion. Using examples and anecdotes, this book offers an approach to banishing the misunderstandings that confuse our relationships.
Critic Reviews
“Tannen combines a novelist's ear for the way people speak with a rare power of original analysis ... fascinating”
'' OLIVER SACKS
About the Author
Best-selling author Deborah Tannen is University Professor and Professor of Linguistics at Georgetown University. She has also been McGraw Distinguished Lecturer at Princetown University.
Why do so many women feel that men don't tell them anything, but just lecture and criticise? Why do so many men feel that women nag them and never get to the point? In this pioneering book Deborah Tannen shows us how women and men talk in different ways, for profoundly different reasons. While women use language to make connections and reinforce intimacy, men use it to preserve their status and independence.Some have claimed that conversations are the forum of male power games, but the author suggests that jockeying for attention is not the whole story and that even when domination is the result, it is not always the intention. She shows how many frictions may arise because girls and boys grow up in essentially different cultures. Where women use language to seek confirmation, make connections and reinforce intimacies, men use it to protect their independence and negotiate status. The result is that conversation becomes a cross-cultural communication, fraught with genuine confusion.
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